Some of you may remember the song, D.I.V.O.R.C.E. that Billy Connolly made famous way back in the 80's. It was a really catchy number with fun words. There is, however, not much fun around the actual act of divorcing someone or indeed a situation. I speak from experience as someone who has had 2 divorces and is now in a happy 3rd marriage.
In the past I decided to keep this fact about me quiet because at some level it made me feel I had failed, that perhaps I was a serial 'failure' at relationships and that people would somehow think less of me were I to tell them of this. I projected my negative judgement of me onto others.
I have moved way beyond that now but not before having a really good hard look at it all and working through the 'stuff' that came up and out of each relationship because at the end of the day I know I have learned a lot from each one and have used that learning in my 3rd lasting relationship to make it work better without falling into the same old patterns and habits that had been my 'stuff' in marriages 1 and 2.
At the end of the day I could only work on myself and heal myself. On both occassions I was the one who decided to split and move forward but in other less formal relationships I had been on the receiving end of an ending and felt the rejection which grew into a resentment that badly affected my self esteem and created buried anger, sometimes directed at myself, sometimes directed at others.
The bottom line is I have now turned what I perceived to be a weakness into a strength as I am able to really help others who are suffering the 'fall out' after a divorce.
As with any enormous change in your life, divorce takes it's toll. Having been part of a duo you are now on your own with many insecurities playing out in your being. If you are the one who instigated the parting then usually you would move on more swiftly to the next chapter of your life.
If you were the one who was severed with, the chances are you may have experienced a deep shock for a while as you were unaware that anything was wrong. You had probably relied on your significant other to do much for you and also deferred and referred to this person and together you ran your joint life. Coming to terms with the others decision to leave, to face life on your own can be a difficult and challenging situation to deal with.
Last but not least the relationship you have with yourself is the longest one you will ever have with anyone and really it is the one that your undivided focussed loving intention should and could be on to make that inner marriage a beautiful harmonious experience.
As a vibrational healer, I look at all of this in terms of energy systems. In marriage or partnership, two energy systems are joined together, then one decides to go and a split happens. It doesn't always happen on the energetic level though as thoughts and feelings continue to be projected into and onto the other which continues to bind the two energy fields together. We all know someone who just hasn't 'moved on'.
There are actions we can take to really sever the connection because if we don't we find that regardless of our present situation there is a part of us inclined to live in the past in the relationship although the other has gone. We can be drained if that person still tunes into us and is sucking the energy away from us. We are oblivious of this. To move on, in a healthy empowered way, so that we can open new doors to a new love, we need to look at it all differently. Creating a positive present moment always creates a positive future moment.
There needs to be a clean energetic break. There are so many ways to do this, it is important that we understand and acknowledge though, first of all, that there is this unseen connection that needs to be turned off. To do that we need to look at what turned the connection on. This is usually an engagement followed by a marriage. Some form of acknowledgement that the relationship is a seriously loving one and it progresses to a marriage ceremony complete with vows or a hand fasting ceremony.
It is good then to formally rescind any vows or promises made in a similarly ceremonious way as that in which the first situation was created. This can be difficult to re-enact on the physical however it can be done on an etheric level relatively easily.
Are you ready to move on?????
That is where my skills as a Hypno/visual VIVA LOVE HEALER come in as I can help you to resolve all the issues around this as well as many other of life's emotional challenges.
You are held in a loving protected environment as this issue is addressed. If you wish to move on quietly and lovingly, holding everyone in the highest possible energy of love and light, then contact me here.
Patricia Iris Kerins July 2016
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